Thought I would post a peek at the little guy at only 20 weeks.

Here is a front view of the little guy at 20 weeks with his little mouth open- he was trying to put his fingers in his mouth during the ultrasound.. He couldn't quite figure out how to do it though.

Profile with his hand under his chin at 20 weeks

Taking my own advice

This week I am GOING to get things done-

Make room for the baby in our tiny two bed apartment (he will be sharing a room with the washer and dryer.. how quaint)

Start boxing mom's things up and actually throwing things of her's out.

No more contractions.

These things are on my top to do list right now, how I am going to do any of them I have not a clue.

I have so many things that I need to get done before this baby gets here but these "to do's" are going to be my top priority right now.

So come to find out those nights I have spent miserable, throwing up and in extreme pain have been me having contractions and apparently I started to dialate just a tad..

I am only 5 months along and this baby better stay in there and cook for a few more months.

I know a lot of women have complications during pregnancy, and a lot of those women end up having perfectly healthy babies in the end.. but at the same time a lot of them end up losing theirs- I am not freaking myself out just yet.. just trying to do what I can to prevent it from happening again.

Just take it easy and not do too much or anything that is going to stress this kid out I guess.. it is a lot harder than it sounds- especially when you have not done one thing to get ready for the baby- ugh...

I have decided that I need to take a little of my own advice.

I had someone ask me the other day " Jori, how do you do it?"

"Do what?"

She said "Everyone can be complaining or making a big deal out of something or get mad at something that really shouldn't matter in the first place and you can just sit there and mind your own business"

I kind of just sat there for a second and I just said "I guess I just don't see the point in making a big deal out of things that don't or shouldn't matter at the end of the day"

I have a lot of things that have been stressing me out the past couple of months and a lot of those things are simply out of my control and I just need to let things happen the way they happen... such as my husband getting a new and better job, getting into a home, my mom's death and everything that is going on with her house, not having room for a baby, money issues and the list goes on but I'll stop there.

I have been trying not to go to my mom's grave lately, well at first it was that I stopped going because it hurt too bad and now it is that I am trying NOT to go because I don't think it helps the whole "Me trying not to stress out" thing.

We are going to my mom's tonight to start boxing her things up and doing who knows what with it. 

How do you get rid of your dead mothers belongings? 

They were her's, if she can't have them then no one should. 

I don't want to split anything up.

I don't want anyone else to ever wear anything of her's.

I don't want to throw her things away... not even the junk.

But this is reality... and it has to be done.

Wish me luck.